Survey

My wife's weird internet survey. I must say her questions are unique if nothing else. :)

You find yourself at the mercy of a mad scientist, mastermind, and dynamite raconteur. He gives you a dolorous choice. You, as the test subject for his experiment, must have your human brain exchanged for an animal's. By his warped sense of fairness, he will allow you to pick the species of beast whose brain will soon be yours. You will, he hopes, behave exactly like this animal in every way. What do you choose?

Wow. This is the opposite end of "If you could be an animal, what would it be?" I guess I wouldn't care what brain they put into my body. Could be that of a retarded squirrel destined to become roadkill at a young age for all I care. My brain's just been removed! I'm frikkin' dead!

Name five things.

Five things? Like, just whatever? OK. Here they are, the first five things that floated across my mind: Trigun collection, Tron 2.0, Mithril Chain Shirt, Star Wars Galaxies, Homestarrunner.com

A supernatural emissary comes before you and states you are a god. You search your vast soul and become self-aware of your divinity. Your first words?

"Finally! My life makes perfect sense."

Fashion magazines proclaim the mullet's return to popularity. What are your thoughts?

"Yes! YesYesYesYesYesYesYesYesYesYesYes!" Then I promptly grow one.

Be honest. Have you ever bought a tabloid? If so, which one was it and why did you sink so low?

I can honestly say I've never purchased one of those. I have, however, looked at their headlines on the racks with deep amusement.

A drakee draws near! Command?

>Attack

*nee* *nee* *nee* *thwak!*
Thou attacks the drakee!
Thou hast done 24 damage to the drakee.
Thou hast defeated the drakee.
Thy experience points have increased by 10.
Thy gold has increased by 24.

Let's have a look at your philes. I see three right here:

1. Bibliophile
2. Heterophile
3. Video...game..phile?

If the governments of the world decided to freeze all culture into the likeness of a single era, which would you vote for and why?

Gotta also say the 80's. I loved everything about it, and it was there and gone so quickly I didn't get to enjoy it.

What is the most ridiculous thing you've shouted in a public setting?

"I love eating nuts! Just not in my stuff!"

And finally, if someone offered you a customized robot, what would it look like and what would its functions include? Would you name it?

Gotta be T3-M4 from Knights of the Old Republic. I'd have him tricked out with all the latest modifications and we'd go around fixing starships and...

Ahh. Dreams.